last evening i had this tangible feeling of being forgotten/forsaken. while i wasn't sure what happened, i tried hard not to doubt or think too much. but i seriously was on the verge of tears.

or perhaps i was on the verge of tears cos i felt stupid.

and i learnt no one can never fail me.

a problem that seems common and normal, but i never want to accept it the way it is. contradictory to how i look at the bigger issue that it leads to.

my life? seems ok. just that every once in a while, i plunged down that abyss of hopelessness and wallow in self pity. but i'll recover soon enough.

i swear it's pms.

i'm too used to ur sweet talks, now u're giving me attitude, and i totally dislike it.

i have a choice. mend it, or break it.

hmmmmm.

maybe i should be a real bitch.

Monday is officially Gym Day. HAHA.

this week has been good.

i made someone happy. i think that's a good thing. :)

i'm almost done with Have A Little Faith! my birthday present from Linda and the girls. i like that book. :)

oh and i recently bought an A4 notebook. guess why. to paste all the newspaper articles and magazine cut outs on GOOD FOOD. i'm gonna make a scrapbook for my FOOD ADVENTURE! so u can take a peek into my book and put ur name beside it, and probably a date too. when i decide to go for it, i'll ring you up and we could go together! hahahhahahaa i think i'm madddd. woooohoooo! but last night when i got home, i asked my mum for newspaper, she said she sold it all to the garang guni man alr. siannnn.

and here goes what i've been up to the whole week.

Monday, gym.

Tuesday, Minds Cafe @ Tamp Safra with Corrin, Elithia & Alyaa! :) they let me win at Settlers of Catan. so nice. hahahahaha.

Wednesday, G Zone service! Peck told me something exciting. i need to start praying about it, before i jump into it! hehehe. :)

Thursday, OT til 10.30pm. had late dinner/supper with Miguel and the always-hear-about-but-never-met-him-before Jeremy Auw. hahahhaa. Simpang! Prata was the bomb! i mean, i had Prata Bomb with cheese. actually, i got home at 12 plus, but i only slept at 3am. too full to sleep!

which means now, Friday, i'm damn tired. i feel like a zombie! but i'm having a good breakfast! Huggs chicken & egg sandwich and Huggs coffee. i like Huggs.

looking forward to my after work activities. simple pleasures that i don't usually get to do, and it takes the right company to enjoy it! :)

worth blogging about.

i've walked out of it. no regrets.

steven and i were talking about scorpio's vengefulness. i suggested that he probably was a scorpio baby who was swopped with a gemini baby. and he said i'm hard-hearted. yes i can be very hard hearted, if i have reasons to be. heh.

so i deleted him off my phone. can't remember his no. and have absolutely no reason to contact him anymore. i don't feel obliged to wait til dec anymore. oh yeaaaa. :)

hmmmm.

why do i not feel the least guilty???

i guess it's gonna be a good thing! heh.

i'm 22 years and 1 day old! :)

i had a smashing good time with the girls last night.

became friends with a twin.

my thoughts are all incoherent now. that's because i had 4 hours of sleep last night. i'm too used to having 7 hours of sleep a day.

steven just texted me about watching Ah Mei's concert on 30 January 2010. i'm happy to go watch her concert! i'm starting to have more things to look forward to in 2010! for this i should be happy!

but.... i'm getting emo cosssssss i'm wavering, i don't know what i want. my mind keeps playing back to that scene where you ask me if this is what i really want. i was very sure, so certain about it, i said yes. now i don't know if/how you'll be part of my 2010.

i haven't updated my blog for quite some time already!

life has been good. Every moment spent with God just makes life worth living. :)

"Lord, grant me the strength to do Your Will, the wisdom to know its timing, the love to keep me going and my trust in you to keep me in perfect peace."

i sooo love this prayer.

a short update of my whereabouts.

last Monday, me and Steven had yogurt for dinner at Fruzen Yoguz. yes, we only ate yogurt! i had Death by Chocolate, and i must say, it doesn't taste like yogurt at all. more like ice cream! HEHE.

Tuesday was Tony Romas @ Suntec with Yinghan, Kokwei, Steven, Kuisiang, and Kelvin. i wore 3 inch heels that day, cos i didn't wanna be a midget! LOL. followed by desserts at Peck Seah Street. Durian Puree with Pomelo! awesome! it was damn shiok man! HAHA. i guess walking about in 3 inch heels from Suntec to Peck Seah Street helped burn some fats too. LOL.

I can't remember what i did on Wednesday! I slept early on Thursday, at 10.30pm!

Friday was the cheapo half day outing to Pulau Ubin with the company. we left office at 12.40pm, and reached the jetty at about 1.40pm. the cycling was kinda tiring, but fun! of course i love going down the slopes! fancy free, break free! lol. good thing no one had any injuries, except for Priscilla's anemia acting up. the weather was hot, but i'm happy cos i didn't get burnt. :)

we had dinner at the italian restaurant at Changi Village Hotel. i thought i could order my own main course, but i didn't expect my boss to order pizza and pasta for everyone to share. -.-" sians.

cabbed back with the 2 new audit assistants. haha. even though there's new blood in the office, sadly i'm still the youngest. booohoooo.

i wanted to wake up and RUN on Saturday morning, but what i eventually did was wake up and sleep. so sad. skipped service and met MigTine at bedok mrt to go down to WuLing's birthday party together. She held her party at Siloso Beach Resort. we left rather early about 10pm, and i got to sit at the back of the lorry on the way home! reminds me of the young times when i used to sit at the back of my uncle's pick up. hahaha. Uncle dropped me home and after bathing, cycled my way to Tine's house for late night movie marathon. shiok man. We watched The Ugly Truth (again!) and Zombieland. i think i have a very weak heart, i cannot take gore. :( i left her place at 5.30am, cycled back home with Mig... hahaha.

Woke up early on Sunday to meet Trisha! lunch at Ion's Soup Spoon. hehehe. thank God my mum told me beforehand that she's gonna cook beef stew, else i would have beef stew at Soup Spoon. haha. we went looking around for skincare again! lol. and the girl at the Laneige counter said my fine lines are showing. i'm freaking sad. i'm more stressed about my face than my tummy. very very sad.

rushed down for church service, totally happy that i didn't miss service! :) Pastor Kong talked about the life of Job - total abandonment in God. loved the sermon. Pastor Kong also enlightened me when he said, "don't marry someone whom you love more than he loves you. don't marry someone who can't tell you he loves you. (aka ai zai xin li kou nan kai)"

and for dinner, i had Fruzen Yoguz again! death by chocolate. me and steven shared a $12.60 bowl worth of yogurt. it was crazy. HAHA. he casually mentioned that this bowl might probably be the biggest they ever sold today, but the cashier girl heard and said, it's the biggest they've ever sold! HAHAHA! Steven does the craziest stuff! HAHA. i'm amazed by how much i can eat whenever i'm out with Steven.

i wanna leave my hair long. but for every single day that i keep my hair long, i have the option of cutting my hair short. SHOULD I CUT???? i'm VERY TEMPTED TO CUT MY HAIR AGAIN! God knows why i would want to leave my hair long. saddddd.